With me my husband, we had five children together, he was ill… he didn't tell… and I didn't know what was wrong with him until he died back home. I didn't know… but when I came here, I just came here for a visit, to see my children who were here. Then as I was about to go back home. According to…when he died, even the death certificate it was gastroenteritis. But the way he looked, he lost weight! 

I kept asking him, 'Is there anything you haven't told me?' And he said, 'No.' But when he was on his death bed, he said to me, 'I am sorry, I am sorry. I am leaving you with children, please look after our children, I am sorry for what I did to you.' I don't know what he meant. 

When I was diagnosed… because I knew no men besides him, that is when I realised. 

When I was diagnosed I was bitter. I cried, I was angry, I said, 'What did you do to me? You knew, why didn't you tell me?' So to me he had killed me, even my children, when I told them about my diagnosis, each one of them said, each one of them said, 'That is dad, what did he do to you? Now you are going to die.' I had to tell the children, 'No it's OK,' he has gone. 

I had to learn to forgive him. I went to churches, because I was angry. Yeah I learnt to forgive him…

Because I was really bitter. Because I was crying, support groups too. It helped me to forgive him and just move on yeah… Yeah it was a struggle, every time I think of it, even at home, trying to pray and it would just come into my mind and then I would start crying, cussing and calling him names. Yeah. What am I to do, he is gone? I said I have to forgive him and go on, and leave the past, and look after my children. That is how I got over it.