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DepressionArrow
Age 40-54
Interview 19  

Interview 19

Age at Interview: 50
Sex: Female
Background: Married with children, was anxious as a child and felt ill-fitted with her family. She left university due to anxiety and struggled for years at a bullying workplace before a debilitating 5 year depression.
Brief outline:Has managed to find joy in life through approaches including medication (currently venlafaxine 150mg & chlorpromazine 25mg), counselling, partner support, Christianity and voluntary work (which led to rewarding employment).


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Her psychiatrist told her she had a chemical imbalance that caused anxiety and depression, which helped her to accept she had an illness that was not her fault.

 



By that stage my consultant had said, "Do you realise you've got a chemical imbalance and you've probably had it all your life"? And that was just like, "Oh thank you God that somebody official is saying what I've always known, but thought I must be wrong about". You know, that there has always been something wrong with me. 

And she said, "You know when we find that medication that suits you, if I was you I would stay on it for the rest of your life, and I wouldn't muck about with it". And at first I said, "But, oh but there is an awful stigma to being on antidepressants and stuff". 

And  she said, "Well if you are a diabetic and I said you are going to need insulin for the rest of your life, you wouldn't argue would you?" And she said, "Look on this the same way, it is exactly the same thing. Your body isn't making - in your case certain neurotransmitters or enough of them - You need the medication to balance it out". 

So she gave me permission really to say, "Yeah I've got an illness. You know, this is not my fault." Because I had always felt it was, and I wasn't trying hard enough you know.
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