Interview 38  

Interview 38

Age at Interview: 45
Sex: Male
Age at Diagnosis: 32
Background: Is a black gay artist, living with his partner. A difficult family life, he thought about suicide at the age of 14 and again when he had depression at 32.

Brief outline:Effective approaches have included counselling from his GP, partner support, doing a 'Landmark' course, swimming, and finding an authentic and creative expression for himself through his work.


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Male
Says black people are viewed as criminal, out of control and sexually rampant, and people can still respond to him stereotypically.

 



But for me the, the fear thing is such, its about stories about black people being criminal, out of control, sexually rampant. So there are any number of settings where people's concerns about who I am manifest as really weird and offensive behaviour towards me. And they're so wrapped up in it I don't think sometimes they realise how offensive they're being, they're just so wrapped up in their own imaginings of what could happen to them. I mean I'm you know I'm a reasonable, honest, law abiding person and I have to deal with the fact that when I am in certain confined spaces people do, do things like grabbing their bags. Or looking, or not wanting to sit next to you or, there are all sorts of things where they make it so obvious. You know I don't think I'm particularly paranoid, you know people will have to be quite crass before I will have to start registering that something actually isn't working.... I'll speak personally because I mean I could pontificate how 'the black community' whatever that is, copes, I don't know. How I deal with it is sometimes its difficult, most of the time its just stuff. You have to remember that I've been in this identity all my life, so it's not as if I suddenly came here and had to learn to be related to differently.... As I was born here, born at a time when racism was really virulent and naked and raw and I now live with increasing layers of veneers of civilised response.... people have learnt what they should and shouldn't say to keep their badge of being related to as a decent person.

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