Yes, it was actually. My, it was basically because my psychiatrist was very active in clinical research. He was always writing papers and doing presentations and stuff. And I wanted to be part of that buzz. I would go to a lecture or something and think, “Wow, this is really interesting” because a lot of research had gone into stuff and it fascinated me. So basically I found out a bit more about it, and I made some contact. And it was really nice getting in touch with my local office. I was welcomed in. I wasn’t treated as, “Oh, you know, you’re not important” or anything. Because in actual fact now, basically the way governance arrangements are around research is that you have to have obviously service user involvement. So, and they didn’t just accept me because they knew they had to involve me to get their funding - because I know that that happens, where clinicians say, “Here, sign here. Fill in that box. Then I can get my money” you know [laughs], type thing. I’ve heard that happen, I’ve heard where people have been taken out for dinner and, you know. It rarely happens now. But we are still having a bit of tokenism, though, where actually the meaningful involvement is still not quite there. However, I was fully, fully involved and, you know, and I’ve got my place within the department, and I’m involved in all aspects of stuff. I’ve even, I even thought up my own proposal for a research project, which got a whole team together. And I sat in this room with all these academics. I could not believe it. There must have been about seven or eight psychiatrists all sitting in a room, and with a statistician and everyone, and all sitting there. And I’m sitting there thinking, “Wow.”

 

And I said to the one psychiatrist, “I’m thoroughly embarrassed. I’ve got you all here for half the day.” And the one psychiatrist said, “No, I think this is absolutely wonderful.” And we got actually shortlisted on one of them, but then we didn’t get past shortlisting. And I was really, really upset. And I remember the one researcher who had put the proposal together said, “Oh” he said, “Don’t worry.” He said, “Research for Patient Benefit will be here for years, so we can keep trying.” And I just thought [laughs], you know, it was just so lovely the way he said that and kind of, you know. And so it’s on the back burner. But we haven’t finished yet. So, you know, so for as long as, as the Institute for Health Research will be there, my proposal will be on the back burner. So that, that was lovely. And also I go on courses and stuff and I’m encouraged to do training and, you know, I help out on stuff. And I do have my own specialist area, which is around personality disorders and eating disorders. However - and psychological therapies - however I recently was approached by a professor who specialises in schizophrenia research, and it was quite nice to be asked to, to help out on that. And that wasn’t tokenistic because he was applying for money, but he genuinely wanted my advice knowing that I worked with other mental health service users. And it was really nice, you know, and it, it was a nice feeling. And I also went away and learnt more. And I also got given a great big textbook as well. So it was great.