When did you find out (how old were you?) and what did your family think about it?

I was about 39 I think - I am not quite sure - My parents were dead by then but my children were not too bothered as it did not make any difference to them as they had grown up knowing me as me. The eldest knew that there were things I did not do but he sort of told me what to do and when and when he left home for uni there was another child who took over the role. When I spoke to the eldest a little while ago I think he had thought about it more and he was very surprised about the things I find very hard but when I said well that is why you did x and x he said he just did them because it seemed natural and not out of the ordinary - he always was and still is (even though he is many miles away) very protective without being dictatorial - we can argue and then laugh and he still likes doing 'silly things' like water fights and climbing rocks and scrabbling up hills and things like that just to see the view and we both love computers and science and care about the beauty in the environment like the clouds moving across the sky or a dragon fly colours.
 
Though now looking back (he said) he could see where he covered for me but at the time he was not aware of it. The child/children who help me now have far more idea of where I need help because now it has a name I can say 'help I cannot do that' like shopping, people at school, strange places etc.... before it would have to be ‘oh I can't carry things’, you have to be there, you can read a map and so on.
 
I spent my life being so frightened that someone would find out and take the children away from me because I was a bad mother because I was relying on them so much - I thought that at any moment they would be a knock on the door. But I am very scared when they leave as I will then be on my own - I have never been on my own. It has been parents-from their house to husband and children - then children and me.