Rachel - Interview 15  

Rachel - Interview 15

Age at Interview: 41
Sex: Female
Background: Rachel is a housewife. She is married and has 2 children aged 3 and 5. Ethnic background/nationality: White British.

Brief outline:In 1981 Rachel’s mother took her own life. She was probably ill with depression when she used a gun to kill herself. Rachel was 15 at the time and was not offered any professional support. Since then she has had some counselling, which has been helpful.

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Female
Rachel learned that you can experience tragedy and yet move forward. She says she could have let her mother’s death ruin her life but she decided not to let this happen.

 



I think in hindsight, you know, initially I went, I certainly, I lost my confidence and became very introverted. But as I’ve got older I’ve actually sort of come out of myself and I feel a lot more confident. I feel very able to make friends, I think because I’m used to having to cope for myself. So maybe initially I lost my confidence. But then I realised that in not having mum, you know, to support me and my dad was away a lot, I had to be quite self-sufficient. So I, I, you know, I can, I always pride myself that you can put me in any situation and I would always, not necessarily make friends, but be able to talk to people and hopefully, you know, build a life for myself. And I think I learned from that that, you know, you can have, not disaster, but tragedy and move forward. And I think I have made the most of my life. And a number of people sort of say, you know, when my, this girl said to me, “But you’re so normal.” I mean I don’t what she thought I, how I should have been. But I think I just realised that you can’t blame how your life turns out on something that’s happened, you know, in the past. I could have, I could have let that ruin my life really. I could have gone on and over and over what had happened. And I think I just realised that mum, you know, all mum’s efforts would have been in vain if we hadn’t made the most of ourselves really. So it’s given me, you know, it’s given me the confidence to go on and, and hopefully make a happy family life.

Bereavement due to suicide
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