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Intensive care
Intensive care: experiences of family & friends
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Reasons for admission :
Emergency admissions
Planned admissions
In the Intensive Care Unit (ICU) :
Seeing the patient in ICU for the first time
Suspending normal routines: visiting ICU every day
Uncertainty
Emotional impact on relatives & friends in ICU
Impact on children
Telling others
Relationships within and between families
Receiving information and news from doctors
Sources of information in ICU
Nursing care
Keeping a diary
Sources of support in ICU
At the bedside:
Waiting for news
Signs of improvement and progress
The relatives' room and overnight accommodation:
The relatives' room
Overnight accommodation
When someone dies :
End of life decisions
Death and bereavement:
When someone dies
Funerals
Coping with bereavement
On a general ward :
The ward environment and nursing care
Hospital discharge and rehabilitation
Life after leaving the hospital :
Supporting and caring for the ill person at home
Impact on work and finances
Attitudes to life after the hospital experience
Messages to others
Emotional impact on relatives and carers
Emotional impact on family and friends
Adjusting to a changed life
Support and information
Support and information
Lack of support and information
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Intensive care: experiences of family & friends
Subject index
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Intensive care
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Intensive care: experiences of family & friends
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Aged 51-60
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Interview 36
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Ask questions and be as positive as you can.
His father went to ICU after having a stroke and developing pneumonia. Members of the family supported one another and he is now closer to his sister.
Intensive care
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Intensive care: experiences of family & friends
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Aged 31-40
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Interview 01
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Gradually her sister was able to communicate, sit up in a chair and go outside for short periods of time.
In March 2005 her sister was diagnosed with Guillain Barre Syndrome. This is a rare disorder of the peripheral nerves, those outside the brain and spinal chord.
Intensive care
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Intensive care: experiences of family & friends
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Aged 31-40
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Interview 35
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Although her mother had good and bad days, she was overjoyed when she saw her sit up, smile and talk again.
Her mother was admitted to ICU because of gallstones and other complications. She visited her every day, often with her two young daughters, and kept a diary.
Intensive care
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Intensive care: experiences of family & friends
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Aged 41-50
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Interview 33
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As her husband began to improve she read out cards and messages of support and, when he had a valve put into his tracheotomy tube, he was able to begi
Her husband was admitted to ICU after having emergency surgery. It was particularly difficult looking after other family members as well as visiting her husband.
Intensive care
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Intensive care: experiences of family & friends
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Aged 31-40
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Interview 18
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Although she was very weak, gradually her friend was able to sit up, stand, walk with a Zimmer frame and have nutritional drinks to help her recovery.
Her best friend spent two weeks in ICU. She was the closest person to her, visited her daily and is now her main carer.
Intensive care
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Intensive care: experiences of family & friends
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Aged 41-50
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Interview 30
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When other visitors asked him questions, it reinforced for him just how important it was for doctors to communicate clearly.
His father died in ICU, aged 83. Being an intensive care doctor, he was able to provide information and support to his mother and brother.
Intensive care
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Intensive care: experiences of family & friends
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Aged 61-70
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Interview 37
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He tried to give support and encouragement to a man who was losing hope for his critically ill son.
His wife spent 49 days in ICU because of severe lung problems. After her illness, he became involved in helping improve services for ICU patients.
Intensive care
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Intensive care: experiences of family & friends
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Aged 61-70
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Interview 37
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Doctors were happy to answer all his questions and phoned him to explain exactly what was wrong with his wife as soon as they'd found out themselves.
His wife spent 49 days in ICU because of severe lung problems. After her illness, he became involved in helping improve services for ICU patients.
Intensive care
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Intensive care: experiences of family & friends
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Aged 41-50
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Interview 03
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At the time her son was ill she didn't know he was being kept alive by machines.
In 2004 her 17-year-old son was a passenger in a car that was involved in a serious accident. He spent 17 days in ICU.
Intensive care
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Intensive care: experiences of family & friends
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Aged 51-60
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Interview 04
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She was extremely disappointed in two doctors who wouldn't believe her when she said her son had shown signs of awareness, and felt it was too soon to
In October 2004, her son had a motorbike accident and was admitted to ICU. He had a serious head injury and broken jaw.
Intensive care
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Intensive care: experiences of family & friends
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Aged 41-50
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Interview 30
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He feels it is important for ICU doctors to keep repeating information, give information that is consistent, and continually update relatives.
His father died in ICU, aged 83. Being an intensive care doctor, he was able to provide information and support to his mother and brother.
Intensive care
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Intensive care: experiences of family & friends
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Aged 51-60
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Interview 22
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He found it hard to understand the information doctors gave him and to retain the information under stress.
His wife had emergency surgery to remove a kidney. He found it difficult to discuss his feelings but received comfort from sitting alone in the hospital chapel.
Intensive care
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Intensive care: experiences of family & friends
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Aged 51-60
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Interview 22
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He praised one of the senior doctors who always told him about his wife's progress very directly and honestly.
His wife had emergency surgery to remove a kidney. He found it difficult to discuss his feelings but received comfort from sitting alone in the hospital chapel.
Intensive care
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Intensive care: experiences of family & friends
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Aged 31-40
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Interview 23
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He felt ICU doctors were extremely skilled but was disappointed in the way some gave information about his partner's illness, which felt very negative
In 2006 his partner spent four weeks in ICU because of pneumonia. He visited her every day, sharing the visiting with his partner's parents.
Intensive care
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Intensive care: experiences of family & friends
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Aged 41-50
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Interview 30
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He feels it is better for doctors to be cautious when giving relatives news rather than raise their hopes or give the impression things are better tha
His father died in ICU, aged 83. Being an intensive care doctor, he was able to provide information and support to his mother and brother.
Intensive care
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Intensive care: experiences of family & friends
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Aged 70 +
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Interview 26
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Some doctors thought her sister-in-law had a chance of recovering when she was first admitted whereas others were less optimistic, and she found this
In 2006 her sister-in-law sadly died in ICU after having an accident in her car. She visited her daily and took care of all the practical matters.
Intensive care
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Intensive care: experiences of family & friends
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Aged 51-60
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Interview 11
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Throughout her husband's stay in hospital and afterwards, she received conflicting information about whether he'd had MRSA, though she understands why
Her husband was diagnosed with pneumonia. She was happy with the nursing care he received in ICU but concerned about information and one of his treatments.
Intensive care
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Intensive care: experiences of family & friends
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Aged 61-70
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Interview 14
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She asked lots of questions and wanted to be kept informed but was surprised when she spoke to other visitors who knew very little about their relativ
She has cared for her husband full-time since he had a heart attack and life threatening infection that meant he had to have his leg amputated.
Intensive care
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Intensive care: experiences of family & friends
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Aged 51-60
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Interview 04
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She felt it was too soon to tell whether her son would be brain damaged after an accident and she didn't want doctors to try and predict the outcome w
In October 2004, her son had a motorbike accident and was admitted to ICU. He had a serious head injury and broken jaw.
Intensive care
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Intensive care: experiences of family & friends
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Aged 30 & under
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Interview 21
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Nurses explained to her in more detail what doctors had told her, and always phoned her whenever her partner deteriorated so she could come in and be
In 2005 her partner had a car accident and spent over four months in ICU. She visited daily while her mother looked after her new baby.
Intensive care
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Intensive care: experiences of family & friends
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Aged 31-40
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Interview 23
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Outreach nurses came to see him and his partner regularly before she was admitted to ICU and prepared them both for what to expect.
In 2006 his partner spent four weeks in ICU because of pneumonia. He visited her every day, sharing the visiting with his partner's parents.
Intensive care
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Intensive care: experiences of family & friends
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Aged 51-60
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Interview 05
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Seeing his wife hallucinating was very distressing and he wished he'd known more about hallucinations beforehand.
In 2003 his wife was involved in an accident in the home. He stayed at the hospital for two weeks while his wife was in the first ICU.
Intensive care
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Intensive care: experiences of family & friends
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Aged 31-40
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Interview 23
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The doctors he spoke to, who were specialists in pneumonia, gave advice to the doctors treating his partner and, together, they helped her recover.
In 2006 his partner spent four weeks in ICU because of pneumonia. He visited her every day, sharing the visiting with his partner's parents.
Intensive care
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Intensive care: experiences of family & friends
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Aged 51-60
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Interview 32
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Before her husband's kidney transplant, she read lots of information about the operation and she and her husband were extremely grateful to the donor.
His husband was admitted to ICU before and after a kidney pancreas transplant. She spent three weeks travelling to the hospital as well as working.
Intensive care
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Intensive care: experiences of family & friends
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Aged 51-60
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Interview 07
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They felt confused and upset and didn't understand why doctors were asking them to think about end of life decisions when their son could breathe with
Their son was admitted to ICU in 2005 with bacterial meningitis. It was a traumatic time but he is now back home and has made excellent progress.
Intensive care
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Intensive care: experiences of family & friends
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Aged 31-40
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Interview 13
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She didn't want her husband to suffer any more and agreed with the doctor's advice to withdraw his treatment.
In 2006 her husband had liver disease and pneumonia and sadly died in ICU. She has gained strength from having counselling and from her spirituality.
Intensive care
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Intensive care: experiences of family & friends
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Aged 70 +
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Interview 26
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She felt confused with the information she received from different doctors but, when her sister-in-law deteriorated even further, doctors made the dec
In 2006 her sister-in-law sadly died in ICU after having an accident in her car. She visited her daily and took care of all the practical matters.
Intensive care
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Intensive care: experiences of family & friends
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Aged 51-60
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Interview 09
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She felt doctors used a lot of medical language and didn't explain clearly that their son would be dying that very night, which came as a huge shock.
Her son had lymphoma and bowel perforation and sadly died on a ward. She felt doctors should explain information clearly to relatives, who are usually unfamiliar with medical terms.
Intensive care
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Intensive care: experiences of family & friends
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Aged 51-60
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Interview 12
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A nurse rang her at three in the morning and told her, once she and her husband were at the hospital, that their son was dying.
In 2005 her 21-year-old son sadly died in ICU. She focuses as much as she can on remembering the good memories they shared.
Intensive care
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Intensive care: experiences of family & friends
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Aged 70 +
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Interview 26
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She and her husband saw her sister-in-law after talking with doctors, who withdrew treatment and removed medical equipment before they went in to see
In 2006 her sister-in-law sadly died in ICU after having an accident in her car. She visited her daily and took care of all the practical matters.
Intensive care
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Intensive care: experiences of family & friends
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Aged 31-40
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Interview 13
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Her husband had told her what kind of a funeral he'd wanted, including the music, and this was something they'd talked about on several occasions.
In 2006 her husband had liver disease and pneumonia and sadly died in ICU. She has gained strength from having counselling and from her spirituality.
Intensive care
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Intensive care: experiences of family & friends
>>
Aged 61-70
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Interview 08
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He felt there was a lack of communication between ICU and ward staff but, once the nurses on the ward knew how ill his wife was, they gave her more su
His wife was admitted to ICU after having complications during emergency surgery. During her time in hospital he had a lot of support from family and his local community.
Intensive care
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Intensive care: experiences of family & friends
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Aged 51-60
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Interview 11
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Her husband had problems with his catheter and she felt that better communication would have helped avoid such a problem.
Her husband was diagnosed with pneumonia. She was happy with the nursing care he received in ICU but concerned about information and one of his treatments.
Intensive care
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Intensive care: experiences of family & friends
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Aged 61-70
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Interview 08
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He would have liked to be able to contact one specific person on the ward who would be able to help with any problems or concerns.
His wife was admitted to ICU after having complications during emergency surgery. During her time in hospital he had a lot of support from family and his local community.
Intensive care
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Intensive care: experiences of family & friends
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Aged 31-40
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Interview 23
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He valued the support outreach nurses had given him and his partner before she was admitted to ICU and would have liked more support from them later o
In 2006 his partner spent four weeks in ICU because of pneumonia. He visited her every day, sharing the visiting with his partner's parents.
Intensive care
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Intensive care: experiences of family & friends
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Aged 31-40
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Interview 15
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At his follow-up appointment, her husband was shown around the ICU and his questions were answered, which was reassuring because he couldn't remember
Her husband was admitted to ICU because of an emergency heart problem, which was never diagnosed. She praised the care and professionalism of the ICU staff.
Intensive care
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Intensive care: experiences of family & friends
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Aged 31-40
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Interview 38
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At first she was worried about hurting her partner because of his surgery but, in time, they felt comfortable again about having sex.
In 2005 her husband had a car accident and was admitted to ICU for two weeks. She feels it is important for couples to discuss their feelings with one another and, when they feel ready, to get back to normal, including having sex again.
Intensive care
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Intensive care: experiences of family & friends
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Aged 51-60
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Interview 11
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She felt the medication her husband had been given caused him severe problems and, if she hadn't been there to look after him and seek help, he might
Her husband was diagnosed with pneumonia. She was happy with the nursing care he received in ICU but concerned about information and one of his treatments.
Intensive care
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Intensive care: experiences of family & friends
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Aged 51-60
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Interview 07
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Get as much information as you can, ask questions if there is anything you don't understand, and never give up hope or being positive.
Their son was admitted to ICU in 2005 with bacterial meningitis. It was a traumatic time but he is now back home and has made excellent progress.
Intensive care
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Intensive care: experiences of family & friends
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Aged 31-40
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Interview 15
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Accept support, ask questions if you need information and be aware that when the patient comes home there will be good and bad days.
Her husband was admitted to ICU because of an emergency heart problem, which was never diagnosed. She praised the care and professionalism of the ICU staff.
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