Do you want to say anything about anniversaries?
Anniversaries are very, very hard; they’re one of those things that you can’t escape. Every year you’ve got several anniversaries, you’ve got Christmas, you’ve got birthday, you’ve got, well I have Mother’s Day, and then you’ve got the anniversary of when it happened, they loom over you. As they get closer you can you can feel this, it’s very oppressive feeling, its, it’s that, it takes you to a dark place to be honest. It is, it sets you back. But I think what, what helps is to try and do something positive, like I’ll take lots of flowers to the cemetery and I’ll make it really nice. I always light candles and I speak to my Mum and I’ll say happy birthday or happy Mother’s Day, and I’ll write something to her. I think you need to again have some sort of connection with the one that you’ve lost, and if you want to cry a lot then that’s fine, let it out. It, you know, just because a year's passed, two years, three years, four years, whatever it may be. You don’t have to be all cleared up and…
…not cry anymore. I think you could cry for the rest of your life if you need to you know? Not every day, but on and off there’s going to be triggers, and they are going to make you go back and visit a dark place. But again you will come out, you will come out of it, and somehow you’ll see the light, I don’t know, you do somehow come through it.
How do you view the future now?
One day at a time.
Yes.
One day at a time. I think you feel broken in pieces, but you somehow do, you do carry on. You just have to I guess.
